You Can't Win
by November Rain 19
Summary: The Angel of Death comes to take Heero away, and Duo has a conversation with her.


You Can't Win Author's Notes: Had this idea a while ago and watching an episode of 'Charmed' brought it back to my mind. Our beloved Shinigami is having a conversation with an Angel of Death.   
  
  


You Can't Win   
by Melissa 

Be-Eep. 

Be-Eep. 

Be-Eep. 

As I sit and contemplate that machine that is making those annoying 'beeps,' I realize how much it reminds me of an alarm clock. A device that shocks you back to cold reality from an otherwise blissful world of sleep. 

God, how I hate this machine. I want nothing more than to smash it, or rip it out of the wall to silence it's infernal wails. I can't do that though, no matter how much I long for silence. 

For if that machine stops making noise, he'll be dead. That damn beeping is the only thing that let's me know he's alive. And you wouldn't know it by looking at him. 

Heero lies in a sterile bed here in an all too white hospital room, so covered with bandages that you can't recognize him. The doctor's don't know how he managed to survive the explosion. It would have killed any other person instantly. 

Heero isn't just _any _other person. He was....is the Perfect Soldier. All his training and conditioning only managed prolonged his life for a little while, it didn't save it. He will die. It's only a matter of time. His condition has done nothing but deteriorate and it's out of the doctor's hands. 

I've been here through it all. I haven't even bothered to change my clothing, which is covered in his blood. I had to literally cut him out of the remains of Wing Zero and then take him to the hospital. I watched as they worked on his broken body, trying to stitch him up, and shocking him repeatedly to try and get his heart beating again. Amazingly they were able to get a faint pulse. After hours upon hours of surgery, they had to give up. Nothing could be done for him, the damage was just too severe. 

I sit and watch the steady rising and falling of his chest, which is induced by a respirator. It's hypnotic, almost. I closed my eyes for only a second and it was at that moment that sleep claimed me. My mind, body, soul and heart were weary. It just hurt too much to stay awake. 

I'm not sure how long I was asleep, but when I came to, I was not alone in the room. As I cracked open my eyes, I caught sight of a girl, about my age, standing at the foot of Heero's bed. I contemplated her for a moment. She stood about 5'6" and had an slim build. Her hair was dirty blonde and hung to just about below the tops of her shoulders. She was dressed in a black t-shirt, jeans and matching black boots. As I looked on, she sighed and went around to the opposite side of the bed that I was sitting on. She stared at Heero with pale blue/grey eyes. She paid me no heed and didn't appear to be aware that I was watching her. 

She then reached up and went to place her hand on Heero's head. 

I had tolerated her up to that point, but now she crossed a line. In one fluid motion I was out of the chair and I grabbed her wrist the moment before it could come in contact with his skin. Startled, she looked at me, her eyes wide. 

"Don't touch him," I growled in a low voice. 

Her jaw dropped open as she continued to stare at me. 

"Who are you? You're obviously not a doctor or a nurse." 

She closed her mouth and swallowed hard. Finding her voice, she finally spoke. 

"You....you can see me?" 

I rolled my eyes. Apparently a patient had escaped from the psych ward. "Yes, I can see you. I can also feel you," I replied, squeezing her wrist some more. "I want to who you are and why you are here." 

"If you release me, then maybe I'll tell you." 

I let go of her wrist and she backed away a few steps. She was mumbling something to herself. 

"Are you going to give me some answers? Or do I have to call hospital security?" 

She chuckled. "You wouldn't believe me even if I told you who I really was." 

"Why don't you try me?" I asked, folding my arms across my chest. 

She arched an eyebrow and gave me a Mona Lisa smile. Crossing over to where I was, she pulled up a chair and sat down. 

"Introduce yourself," she said. 

I decided to play along. I extended my hand in greeting. "My name is Duo Maxwell. I am the pilot of Deathscythe Hell." 

She took my hand and shook it. "It's nice to meet you, Duo Maxwell. I'm the Angel of Death." 

My eyebrows rose. I was certainly dealing with a loony. 

"See?" she said. "I told you you wouldn't believe me." 

"You?" I laughed. "You're the Angel of Death?" 

She nodded, which just made me laugh harder. 

"Fine. I'll just have to prove it to you." 

"Oh? How are you going to do that?" 

She was still holding onto my hand. "Like this." 

It all happened so quickly, I can't even describe what really occurred. It was like I blinked, and in that fraction of a second I found myself someplace other than Heero's room. It appears that she transported us to another hospital room. 

I forced my hand out of her grip and stumbled backwards. 

"W-what?...How?...Where??" 

She cut me off. "Would you please breathe before you pass out?" 

I sucked in a big breath, trying to calm myself. "Where are we? How did you do that?" 

"You wanted to know how I was going to prove it to you, and this is it. Basically you're going to be a witness." 

"A witness to what?" 

She looked at me, a hint of sadness in her eyes. "Someone is about to die. You're going to see me take their soul." 

I glanced over to the bed. A little girl was lying there, her hand being held by middle aged woman. If I had to guess, I would say it was her mother. Slowly, I walked over to the end of her bed. 

"It's all right. They can't see or hear you." 

"Why?" 

"I suppose you can call it one of my 'powers.' There's a reason that you don't see angels walking around on the streets, you know." 

I nodded numbly and glanced down at the chart. This little girl had N stage cancer, and by the looks of her, she wasn't long for this world. What really tore my heart was her mother. The worst thing in the world to happen to a parent is having to bury their child. 

All the monitors that were attached to the little girl began to slow down. I frantically turned and looked at my companion. She made her way over and stood next to the little girl. Just then, one monitor released a high pitched shriek, signaling that the girl's heart had stopped. My companion reached over and placed her hand on the little girl's, and then pulled her soul out of her body. The soul, which basically looked like a transparent copy of the girl, just stood there. The only difference was that she looked infinitely better than her body did. She looked at the Angel of Death with sad eyes. 

"Time to go, Little One." 

"Where are we going?" 

"It's a surprise, you'll see when we get there." 

The little girl glanced at the hysterical woman for a moment. "Can Mommy come with us?" 

"Sorry sweetie. Your mom has to stay here. You'll see her again though....one day." 

The little girl griped the Angel's hand tightly. 

"I'll be right back, Duo." And with that, she and the soul of the little girl disappeared. 

All I could do was stand there and watch this poor woman sob over the body of her daughter. 

The Angel of Death returned shortly, just as she had promised. 

"C'mon. I'll take you back to Heero." 

I nodded as she took my hand and transported us back to Heero's hospital room. I barely made it back to my chair before my knees gave out. 

"I'm sorry," she said. "I know this is a little overwhelming." 

"You think?" I shot back. "Tell me something. Do you always bring people to watch you kill, or was I just lucky?" 

"First off, I didn't kill her." There was an edge to her voice. Apparently I had hit a nerve. "I merely retrieve the souls whose bodies can no longer carry them. And second of all, you are the only person who has ever seen me in my thousands of years as an angel. For the life of me, I can't figure out how you were able to do it, but you did. Plus, that was the only way to prove to you what I am." 

"So this is what you do. You touch people and take their souls away some place." 

She nodded. 

This was a lot to absorb. As I sat there, trying to process all that has happened, a horrible thought occurred to me. 

"You came here to take Heero!" 

"Yes." 

I got out of my chair and rushed towards her, intent on taking her by the shoulders and forcing her to leave. Imagine my shock when I passed right through her. 

She sighed. "It will do you no good to fight me. You can't win." 

I whirled around to face her, my blood boiling. I was so angry at her. 

She spoke to me, with sympathy in her voice. "Please, calm down." 

"Calm down?? I just watched you take someone's soul, and now you want to take the soul of my best friend! Forgive me if I'm not totally OK with that." 

"He's dying, Duo." 

We stood in silence for awhile, just staring at each other. I knew that he was dying, but I didn't want to admit it even to myself. 

"Why are you fighting it?" she asked at last. 

I snorted in disgust. "Isn't it obvious? I don't want you to take him." I added to my self mentally. 'You've already taken away too many people that I love. I don't want to lose another.' 

Her brow creased as apparently my words stung. She then shook her head. "That's not what I meant. Why are you fighting the sorrow you feel? If you allow yourself to grieve, you can let him go." 

I began to pace. "I don't want to let him go," I said, avoiding her eyes. "And besides, boys don't cry." 

"There's no shame in crying. It's all right." 

At that moment I could feel tears begin to form at the corners of my eyes, but I rapidly blinked them away. She was practically giving me permission to cry, but I wasn't going to let it happen just yet. "How much longer?" I croaked out. 

"Not long. It was pure chance that you happened to interrupt me, or would have taken him earlier when I first arrived. He's basically living on borrowed time." She paused, staring at me. "You can't delay the inevitable." 

I released a breath I didn't realize I was holding. There was nothing I could do to stop this. It was just like losing Solo, Father Maxwell and Sister Helen. I felt so helpless. 

"Can he still hear me?" 

"Yes. I'll give you a moment alone." 

I looked up to thank her, but she was gone. I went over to the chair and sat down. I gently laced my fingers with those of Heero's hand. There were so many things I wanted to say, and I hadn't a clue as to where to start. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I began. 

"I wish this was all a dream. Some horrible nightmare that I could wake up from and realize that everything is fine. But I'm not going to wake up, and as a result, neither will you. I always thought that out of any of us, you would have been the one to survive this war. You deserve to know a life, to have a life, without fighting or killing or being a soldier. I know you may not think so, but you're my best friend. It won't be the same without you giving me your patented death glares, or stealing my spare parts for Wing. I hope you can forgive me for letting you go. I don't want to, but it's something that has to be done. I'll miss you, Heero." 

I opened my eyes and once again saw her standing there. 

"I'm sorry," she whispered softly. 

"I know," I replied. 

As I watched, she placed her hand upon Heero's head. Mere moments later his soul was drawn out of his body and standing beside her. The shrill screech of the heart monitor signaled the impending death of his body. I could do nothing but watch as they faded from my vision. Just before they completely disappeared, Heero turned slightly and and offered me a half smile. Then they were gone. 

There was nothing I could do to stop the tears this time. I cried, sobbing as though my heart would break. It hurt so bad, I could barely breathe. I wanted to hate her, hate her for taking him away from me. As much as I want to though, I can't. Everyone dies, it's only a matter of time. 

Life is merely a battle, in a sense. One that is fought against death. 

One you can't win.   


The End 

More Author's Notes: I would love to know what you thought of it. Until next time. 

"You know, a heart can be broken, but it keeps on beating, just the same." - Fannie Flagg, Fried Green Tomatoes At The Whistle Stop Cafe   
  
  
  



End file.
